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September 2020                      September 2020
 We’ll begin with a box and the plural   Then  one  may  be  that  and  them  would
 is boxes    be those ,
 But  the  plural  of  ox  becomes  oxen,   Yet  what  in  the  plural  would  never  be
 not oxes.   whose.
 One  fowl  is  a  goose  but  two  are   And the plural of cats, not cose.
 called geese   We  speak  of  a  brother  and  also  of
 Yet the plural of moose should never   brethren,
 be meese.   But though we say mother, we never say
 You may find a lone mouse or a nest   methren.
 full of mice   The  masculine  pronouns  are  he,  his  and
 him
 Yet the plural of house is houses not
 hice.   But  imagine  the  feminine,  she,  shis  and
 shim.


 If  the  plural  of  man  is  always  called
 men,   Let’s face it – English is a crazy language.
 Why should not the plural of pan be   There is  no  egg in eggplant,  nor  ham  in
 called pen?   hamburger,
 If I  speak  of  my  foot  I  show  you  my   Neither apple nor pine in pineapple,
 feet,   English  muffins  weren’t  invented  in
 And if I give a boot, would a pair be   England.
 called beet?
 If one is a tooth and a whole set are   At  this  point  I  must  leave  you  and  God
 teeth,   Bless You All.
 Why shouldn’t the plural of booth be   Goodbye until the next time.
 called beeth?
 Ted Cox



 The Sound of Sirens
 We woke up at 6 o’clock in the morning, not to the vibration of an alarm clock
 but  to  the  sound  of  sirens.  It  was  impossible  to  know,  which  of  the  emergency
 services was involved, but with the recent forest fires not too far away from here,
 we did think it was likely to be the movement of fire engines.
 Any which way, it made a change from the chirrup and twitter of bird song, which
 generally  wafts  through  our  bedroom  window,  at  that  time.  When  a  person  is
 trying  to  focus  on  what  particular  day  of  the  week  it  might  be,  the  last  thing
 needed, is the doppler effect. Being grateful for small mercies, however, we were
 glad that we did not live at the other end of our village.
 The significant drawback with the other end of the village, is that it backs onto the
 bypass, which gives it a significantly high level of rumbling road noise. The extra

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